Friday, February 22

Ice-Breaker

When you were standing on the edge of a four story building, when you were all alone with just the darkness around you, when wind blows like a mad horse on your face, when you were trying to figure out something beyond the sky through the tear-filled eyes... what exactly will be going through your mind?...

Well, exactly at the same kind of above described situation last night, I thought “what if I jump from here, right now?”…

Something inside me was begging me to do just that. It was just tempting me to close the eyes and jump with hands wide open. Like a free bird. Like the whole world is under your feet for a second, breaking all the shackles in a magical moment. Feel the air. Feel the darkness. Feel the taste of infinity. Feel the joy of autonomy. And then, go deep, deep, deep down towards the earth. Kiss it goodbye.

You know me. You have definitely seen me. Somewhere around a corner of your life. May be on the other side of an ever busy road. May be at your office. May be among the laughing gang around you. May be in your bed lying next to you. May be… in your mirror.

I am not the-chosen-one by God, if there is one, to send some message to this filth-filled world.
I am not any special one to make your blood pump to its maximum limit.
And certainly, I am not the greatest since the sliced bread.

Don’t you think I’ve made it a bit easy for you now?

Grown up with the dreams of being the next big thing that mutters all over the brain cells. Happily sketching the plans to win the whole world with a powerful smile, a match winning stroke, an award winning profile… And then to wake up late to learn the fact that these are never going to happen,I am one of the hundred faces that pass you by, daily.

Yes sir! I am one of those all singing all dancing craps of the world.

Pausing for a moment and looking back at my stupid little life gives me irk down somewhere around my heart. The mistakes I did, the wrong options I chose which lead me down the lane to the point where I am now. Doing shits that I never wanted to do, living a life that was never in my script…The ever-changing masquerades taking its toll and losing myself again and again to the vortex of time…

I wonder, what might have gone through my mind though, while walking on that solitary road which leads to my home from my tuition, fifteen years back. That was one of the most enjoyable moments of my life. No one around, like a free bird, dissolved in the thin cold air, head completely synced with the sky counting stars…

Man oh! Man oh! Man oh! Man. How I wish to go back to those days now! Just in a flash of a second, with a single stroke of a magical wand. Start my life all over again right from the scratch, and orchestrate it the way I wanted it to go. But life is never going to be a written script for anyone, is it?

...breaking all the shackles in a magical moment, Feel the air. Feel the darkness. Feel the taste of infinity. Feel the joy of autonomy. And then, go deep, deep, deep down…

And never does it have a perfect ending.

2 comments:

Kumar said...

If a person is able to discover him/herself,out of him/herself, than only he is a person rather that particular animal remains a bloody game.I know you and you are among some of the persons on this revolving ball who have the understanding about himself.This is not only about getting the physical achievements but to attain at least one second of pleasure when your soul can feel the chilling blow of air.Yea friend that is LIFE.

Ram Naidu said...

It’s really amazing the way you have personified things to your oblivion difficulties. This all speaks thousands about your personality, As some one rightly said “action speaks more than words”, & now I’m saying all this keeping in mind to whatever I know about ‘vinu’, that you are the action and I’m the admirer of those actions. Hoping for some more readings and helpings in the course of our competition, from a “Tall dark handsome” (oops! I’m straight), this means I’m looking for learning something from your association. All the best. God bless you!